Shark In The Water
by fivecents
Summary: Clare and Eli's relationship is about to take a deadly turn when Eli's past comes back to haunt him.
1. The Past Should Stay Dead

Clare and I sauntered down the hallway to English class; my hand curled over hers. I looked down at her and admired her glossy curls, the way her eyelashes fluttered against her cheek every time she blinked, how her nose was the perfect little slope. She caught me staring and I watched at her sparkling blue eyes slowly making their way to mine and the way her pale, pink lips lifted upward. She took my breath away.

"What are you looking at?" she jokingly accused. "Is there something on my face?" Her elegant, little fingers drummed against her face as she laughed at me.

"You're beautiful," I murmured. I felt my heart pound as I saw her face soften and her fingers slowly trail down the side of my cheek. My hand gently cupped her chin and I lifted her face up so that I could kiss her. Her lips fit mine perfectly as she responded lovingly to my kiss. But all too soon it was over as she broke apart from me.

"That was nice," Clare said softly and she smiled. I wanted nothing more than to put that smiling mouth back against mine but I knew Clare wouldn't like it if I tried to kiss her again. She wasn't a big fan of PDA.

"So," Clare said, interrupting my thoughts of hot and heavy make-out sessions in the back of Morty. "Are you seeing that new movie with me tonight?"

"Not that chick flick with the vampires?" I fake groaned. I loved to goad her about her vampire obsession.

She whacked me with the back of her hand. "Hey! You promised!" she cried, giggling.

"Twist my rubber arm...girlfriend," I drawled and leaned down to kiss her again.

"Girlfriend, Eli? Really?" a girl's voice asked quietly.

I froze. My heart started to slam hard against my ribcage as I turned around. I felt Clare peer over my shoulder.

A girl with long brunette hair and green eyes stared at me. She was skinny and short and a person I thought I'd never see again.

"Elizabeth?" I managed to croak out her name. I wanted her to be a mirage, a ghost, anything but real but I watched as she took a smell step towards me and I knew that this was no daydream.

"Hi Eli," the girl whispered. She was studying Clare for a second and then she turned her face back to me. "So? Girlfriend?"

"Eli?" Clare moved to stand by my side and looked at Elizabeth questioningly. "Whose this?"

A million thoughts were flooding through my head, and I wasn't sure who was asking what. I still could hardly believe my eyes.

Elizabeth saw me struggle and her mouth twisted into a smile. "I'm Elizabeth...I _was_ Julia's best friend" she answered Clare.

Clare's eyes widened in surprise, she turned back to me, waiting for me to say something.

Elizabeth though, brought Clare's attention back to her. "You do know who Julia was, don't you?" she asked.

Clare nodded and replied hesitantly, "Yes, she was...she was Eli's old girlfriend who died."

Elizabeth raised her eyebrow at me. "Eli how is it that your girlfriend knows about Julia but not about me? You can't tell Julia's story without talking about me."

I felt my throat go dry but before I could say anything Elizabeth began to walk away. "I'll see you around Eli," she called over her shoulder. "Bye Eli's girlfriend."

Just like that, Elizabeth was back in my life, when I thought I had made sure to keep her out.


	2. Trust In You

Clare wasn't speaking to me. After Elizabeth had walked away, Clare had calmly asked me what I was hiding from her. I wanted to tell her, God knows how bad I wanted to tell her, but I couldn't. What Clare didn't know was that my secret would end our relationship. Clare would never be able to look at me the same again. I couldn't even bear the thought of Clare looking at me with malice in her eyes.

When I told Clare I couldn't tell her she had just nodded her head and walked away from me. Her back was completely straight and she never looked back. She turned a corner, and then she was gone. I felt my heart snap, crumble, then shatter into a thousand shards that I could feel piercing my whole body. I slowly shuffled towards English class.

When I sat in my seat next to Clare she made a point of angling her body away from me. I prayed for the teacher to give us a partner assignment so I could beg Clare to understand. Luck finally came my way when Mrs. Kwan told us to get with our writing partners and discuss chapter four and five in the Scarlett Letter.

I scooted my desk next to Clare and leaned forward and murmured, "Clare please understand, I want to tell you but I-"

Clare cut me off though. "Look Eli, I can't be with someone who keeps things from me. How can I be in a relationship without trust, and you clearly do not trust me." Behind the coolness of Clare's remark I could hear how wounded she sounded.

"It's-it's not like that at all Clare! I do trust you but...this would change things ok? I just, I don't want things to change." I clearly heard the pleading in my voice.

Clare finally turned to me but her expression was incredulous. "So your hiding some big, dark secret from me that you think is going to make me change how I feel about you? Well Eli, if that's true than maybe you haven't been 'real' with me this whole time and I don't want to be with someone who's fake." She twisted away from me again.

I spent the rest of the period begging her to understand but Clare ignored me. Then the bell rang and Clare gathered all of her stuff and left. I quickly grabbed my bag off the floor and chased after her.

"So...are we still seeing the movie tonight?" I asked tentatively, desperately.

Clare whirled around and faced me. Her face was angry and I was surprised to see that her blue eyes were glistening with tears.

"Leave me alone Eli, just go away," she snapped and then with a small sob she darted away.

Suddenly, there was Elizabeth at my side. She rested her chin on my shoulder and I felt her chest rise with laughter as she pressed her body against mine.

"Well, well, well, seems like your making the same mistakes again Eli," she purred in my ear. I spun around and I felt anger pulsing through my veins.

"What the fuck are you doing?" I hissed.

Elizabeth's eyes were glittering. She let out a laugh and shook her head at me.

"Oh honey, secrets are deadly. You remember that from last time, don't you?" she asked and then she pressed her lips against my cheek. I shoved her off of me and backed away but Elizabeth just gave another mirthless laugh and then began to strut away.

"Why are you here?" I called at her retreating figure, my whole body shaking with livid quakes.

"You thought you could leave me behind," Elizabeth said as she began to round a corner. She paused and turned to face me. "I wanted you to know that it wouldn't be that easy."


	3. Love The Way You Lie

Gusts of rain whipped around us. My hair was plastered against my face and my clothes were soaked completely through but I was oblivious. The wind howled and so did we. She was screaming at me for not being honest with her, from keeping secrets. I was bellowing right back that there wasn't anything going on, that I was only trying to protect her. But Julia wouldn't believe me.

Tonight was supposed to be romantic. We were supposed to go out to celebrate Julia's birthday a couple days early. Then, Julia had received a text message. There was a picture attached to the text, a picture of me and another girl. Underneath the picture were the words: BEHIND JULIA'S BACK. Julia had fled the restaurant immediately, leaving the phone behind. When I picked it up I felt a sick lurch of fear in the pit of my stomach. I ran after Julia.

Lightning zigzagged across the sky briefly lighting up the dark street. I saw Julia a couple feet ahead of me, sobbing into her hands. I splashed my way over to her, getting drenched in the process but not caring in the slightest. I grabbed her around the shoulders and forced her to look at me.

"Julia," I gasped, "it's not what you think. I promise you, it's not!"

Julia heaved me off of her and met my eyes with a fierce look. She broke out in hysterical laughter, even though we both know this was the least funny situation we'd ever been in.

"Yeah Eli? So tell me what is it? Tell me how a picture of you hooking up with my best friend is really you not hooking up with my best friend!" Her voice was shrill and broke at the end as she let out another cry.

"Julia, Elizabeth is _obsessed _with me. The other night she-she told me to come to her house for a birthday present for you that she wanted to show me and she just-she just ambushed me. I promise you, I'd never do that to you!" I said frantically.

Julia didn't buy it though. She shook her head and her auburn hair whipped around her face. She looked up at me with quivering brown eyes and whispered, "Elizabeth would _never_ do that to me. _You're lying_."

I stared at her in disbelief. I'd never lied to Julia and I'd made sure to never give her a reason to not trust me but Elizabeth...Elizabeth was a whole other story. Elizabeth lied constantly to Julia but here stood Julia, taking Elizabeth's side over mine. I found myself growing angry despite myself.

"Jules, would you get a fucking grip? I wouldn't do that shit to you!" I spat.

"DON'T CALL ME JULES," she shrieked, "YOU'RE A GODDAMN LIAR ELI." She made to walk away from me but I grabbed her arm and pulled her back realizing that if I let her walk away she would be walking out of my life forever. Little did I know that that would happen anyways.

"Julia don't-" I said.

"Get off me!" she jerked out of my grip again but she faced me and didn't leave. "If Elizabeth was so 'obsessed' with you then why didn't you tell me that hmm?"

I looked at Julia. The way her tiny face was twisted in rage and heartbreak. I felt the rain pounding down on me and I looked up at the sky, searching for an answer that would explain everything to her. Julia took my silence though as an answer.

"I knew it," she said quietly. She turned and walked away from me and got on her bike that she had left propped against a streetlight. The whole world was dark except for the halo of light that enveloped Julia and her bike. I watched as the one person who meant more than anything to me rode off into the darkness. I don't know how long I stood in the rain for.

That night, I got a call from Julia's mother. A car had hit Julia. She hadn't made it.


	4. The Tension And The Terror

My memory of the night Julia died is iffy. Some parts I can remember with sharp clarity, but other parts are just a blur of images and sounds. There was always one part of that night though, that bothered me. It was an idea I had that I'd never told anyone about because the thought, quite frankly, terrified me. It was the intuitive feeling that Elizabeth had been there that night, that she had been the one to hit Julia. I had no facts to prove this, just this gut-wrenching sensation in my stomach that told me I was right.

At Julia's funeral I saw Elizabeth a couple pews in front of me. As the minister droned on with his bogus speech that didn't do justice to the wonder that had been Julia, I watched Elizabeth. The room was filled with people crying quietly, including Elizabeth. That is until she looked up and saw me staring at her. She gave me a huge smile and I saw her shoulders shake with laughter. Then, before I could do anything she pretended to be crying again. It was then I knew that Julia's murderer was in the same room as me. I left the funeral and drove home, my heart hammering in my chest.

I remember the second I got out of my car I vomited. My body was shaking and I had broken out in a cold sweat. Elizabeth had killed my girlfriend. I couldn't process it but I knew that I needed to get the hell out of town. I was scared shitless of who else Elizabeth would harm. In a week, my family had packed up and moved to Degrassi. I had thought I'd gotten rid of Elizabeth but clearly I was wrong.

Knowing what Elizabeth had done to Julia I realized I needed to come clean to Clare. Clare wasn't safe anymore, not when Elizabeth knew I was interested in her. I headed to Clare's house right after school.

My knuckles rapped sharply against Clare's front door and I prayed to God that she would be home. God answered, and Clare opened her door. She stared at me for a second and made to shut the door again but I quickly jammed my foot into the doorway before she could.

"Clare, I'm sorry," I began, "I want to tell you about what happened."

Clare looked at me and then opened the door and I quickly walked in.

"Is anyone else home?" I asked her nervously.

She gave me an odd look but she nodded and replied, "Yeah my dad's in his office. Why?"

I just shook my head and led Clare upstairs to her bedroom. I shut her door and leaned against it as Clare sat on her bed and pointedly stared at me, waiting for me to talk.

"Elizabeth...killed Julia," I whispered. I'd never said that out loud before and I felt a shiver go up my spine.

Clare looked at me, her eyebrows rising in disbelief. "Excuse me?" she spluttered.

I sat on the bed next to her and launched into my tale. How when I started dating Julia, Elizabeth would give me flirtatious looks, which turned into crude notes that morphed into sexual advances. I told Clare about how at first I had just thought Elizabeth was a bitchy friend of Julia's but I soon realized just how crazy for me Elizabeth was. I told Clare about the time Elizabeth had shoved me into a room at a party and tried to go down on me. Then, I told Clare about the night before Julia's death and what had happened at Elizabeth's house.

"I wouldn't have gone to Elizabeth's that night if I thought she was still crazy but for a couple of weeks she stopped trying to get with me. She was really polite to me and I thought maybe she had just given up and was done playing games but...I was so fucking wrong. When she told me she had a gift for Julia's birthday that she wanted me to see, I thought maybe she felt bad for trying to steal me away from Julia and wanted to get her a really big birthday present or something. So I went to her house. And...and her parents weren't home and there were candles and rose petals all over her bedroom and she was there, just wearing a bra and underwear. God, the sickest part of all was that she...she," I tried to finish my story but that night was so vivid in my mind that it made me sick.

Clare put her hand over mine and said, "You don't have to finish the rest Eli-" but I shook my head. I needed to tell my story, it needed to be said.

I took a big breath and continued, "She was standing there and she had carved my name into her stomach. I just remember how the L was dripping blood and I was so scared, even scared for her because I didn't know how sick she was until then. Before I could do anything though she walked up to me and kissed me and I just remember running out of that house as fast as I could. I guess she had a camera in her room that recorded us because the next night, the night Julia died, she sent a picture of the kiss to her."

Clare was gripping my hands in hers and I told her the rest of what exactly happened the night of Julia's death and what I had witnessed at Julia's funeral.

Tears streamed down my face as I recalled all the horror that I had happen to me and I looked up into Clare's face, which was also streaked with tears and whispered, "I'm so fucking afraid Clare. For you and me. I'm sorry."

Clare pulled me to her and hugged me and she whispered, "It's different this time Eli. She won't do anything. I won't let her hurt us."

Despite Clare's promise, I felt completely uneasy and knew that whatever horror Elizabeth had planned, hadn't even started yet.


	5. If You Can't Sleep

The next morning, I pulled into Clare's driveway. I didn't like having her out of my sight knowing that Elizabeth was around so I told Clare that I'd be picking her up and driving her home everyday. Clare had hastily agreed.

I honked my horn to let Clare know I was there and then drummed my fingers against the steering wheel. One minute ticked by and then another and I started growing edgy.

"Clare's fine," I murmured, trying to reassure myself. Then, I let out a sigh of relief as Clare's front door opened and she emerged. She gave me an apologetic look as she opened the passenger side door and slid into Morty.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, my parent's were fighting again and they dragged me into the middle of it," she said, rolling her eyes, clearly displeased with her parent's immaturity. A couple of months ago, Clare had been devastated when her parents started to constantly bicker but she told me that now, she just wanted them to get a divorce and move on.

"It's ok," I said as I backed out of her driveway and headed towards school, "I'm sorry about your parents."

She just nodded her head, clearly bored with the subject. She turned to me and I could see her staring at me intently.

"What?" I asked, when Clare didn't say anything.

"I'm worried about you Eli," she said simply.

"Yeah, well that makes the both of us," I said shortly. I didn't mean to snap at her but I was exhausted after not being able to sleep at all last night.

If Clare noticed my temper, she chose to ignore it, and for that I appreciated her all the more. Clare knew I wasn't angry at her, I was just mad at the world for putting me in this shitty situation.

We got to school and I parked Morty by the basketball courts. I scanned the crowd of kids hanging around, looking for Elizabeth. When I didn't see her I muttered, "Let's go" and we got out of the car.

Clare stayed close to my side and reached for my hand. I could see the goosebumps crawling up her arms and I knew that she was scared, although she was putting on a brave face. I now noticed that Clare too, had bags under eyes, and I instantly felt bad knowing that what I had told her had probably kept her awake as well. I squeezed her hand and she gave me a small smile and squeezed back. We headed into Degrassi.

* * *

A couple of days went by and there was no sign of Elizabeth. If she was still at Degrassi, I didn't see her. Neither did Clare.

"It's spooky," she said wearily. We were both incredibly worn-out from keeping our defenses up at all times. "I don't like knowing that she's around but us not being able to see her."

I nodded my head in agreement. Elizabeth wasn't the kind to stay hidden in the shadows and her new tactic made me think that since the last time I'd seen her she'd become more cunning. I didn't like it one bit.

We were sitting at a picnic table by the bike racks outside of the school. It was lunchtime and I was distractedly picking at my sandwich. Clare was doing the same with her meal.

I looked up to say something reassuring to Clare, since it was my fault she was in this distressed state in the first place when I saw something out of the corner of my eye.

"Speak of the devil," I said and Clare and I both watched as Alli and Elizabeth ambled out of the school, laughing and whispering to each other. Elizabeth caught my eye and grinned. She nudged Alli and pointed towards us. Alli looked over at Clare and me and smiling wide, waved at us. Clare meekly waved back and then grabbed my hand, gripping it tightly. Alli and Elizabeth started walking towards us, Elizabeth amusedly staring me down the whole time.

"Eli," Clare hissed, "what do we do?" But I just shook my head. I had no answer and it was too late because the duo arrived at our table.

"Hey guys," Alli trilled, "Elizabeth and I were going to head over to The Dot for lunch. You guys want to come?"

Elizabeth was looking at me with a smirk on her face. She gave an exaggerated wink and said, "Oh Alli, these two lovebirds look like they don't want to be bothered. We should just leave them be."

"You're right. Leave us alone," Clare said brusquely. She was glaring daggers at Elizabeth but her hand was still throttling mine in panic.

Alli's eyes widened at Clare's tone but before she could say anything, Elizabeth linked arms with her and started to lead her away.

"Bye you guys," Elizabeth chirped as she pranced away with Alli, "I'll be seeing you both!"

I slowly swung my head back around to face Clare. Her eyes were wide with fear and she whispered, "Eli, why is she with Alli?"

My throat was dry and I croaked, "I don't know...but it's not good."


	6. My Fist, Your Mouth, Her Scars

**So I'm not very proud of this chapter, I couldn't seem to write it right. Anyways, I'd love if you guys would review it and let me know what you guys think I should do to improve. ^.^

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Elizabeth was no longer skulking, hidden around the school. Instead she was flouncing about, usually accompanied by Alli. Clare and I saw Elizabeth everywhere. If we were turning a corner, Elizabeth would be rounding the same corner, blowing us a kiss as she breezed past. Each time Clare and I were walking to Morty after school, Elizabeth would be leaning against a neighboring car, giving us a toothy sneer. I hated seeing her everywhere. I was constantly worried, but more for Clare than for myself.

Clare, whose face was round and full, now looked gaunt and pallid. Her blue eyes were rimmed with dark circles and her shoulders were always sagging, as if she were carrying a huge weight upon them. She looked downright ill, and I knew it was the anxiety that was doing this to her. I also knew that she was terribly vexed over Alli. Whenever Clare saw Elizabeth with Alli, she would watch Alli with distressed, concerned eyes.

It was a Monday; three weeks after Elizabeth had walked back into my life and turned it upside down. Clare and I were pulling into the school parking lot when Clare grabbed my hand. I instantly looked around for any sign of Elizabeth but there were none.

"What's up?" I asked Clare and then Clare broke down. She began to sob into her hands and her shoulders shook. I instantly wrapped my arms around her and she buried her face into my chest.

"I c-c-can't keep d-doing this Eli," she wailed into my shirt. "I'm s-s-so scared all the-the time and I'm just so t-t-tired. W-What if she h-h-hurts Alli? Or y-you? I w-wouldn't be able to b-bear it!"

I stroked her hair and tried to reassure her. "Clare it'll be fine. I'll...I'll fix this ok?" I felt a lump in my throat; it broke my heart to see Clare so worn down because of me.

She shook her head and pulled away from me.

"I don't want you doing anything stupid Eli," she sniffled, wiping the tears from her cheeks. She gave a great sniff and looked at me. "Promise me Eli that you won't do anything stupid."

I gazed down at her sad angelic face.

"I promise Clare," I said, "nothing stupid."

In my head, I vowed to make sure to keep Clare safe, at whatever cost.

* * *

Tuesday, I dropped Clare off at her house. She gave me a wave and I smiled back and waited until I saw she was safely in the house before I left. It was growing dark outside, since Clare and I had spent most of our time after school at The Dot with Adam. As I drove I didn't head towards home, instead I headed towards the school. Somehow I knew Elizabeth would be there. I pulled into the parking lot and turned off Morty's engine.

The school was dead silent, like a morgue. The whole building was dark and ominous and I could hear the basketball hoop chains making an eerie clinking noise. I jerked open my door and walked up the stairs and into the school. I wasn't afraid though. The past three weeks had managed to drain any sort of emotion out of me. I was just numb now.

I wandered the hallways, looking for Elizabeth. The only thing I could hear were the sound of my footsteps. There was no sign of Elizabeth. I closed my eyes, remembering every crazy thing Elizabeth had done. I opened my eyes, now knowing where Elizabeth would be. I felt shivers go up my arms as I turned around and started to head towards Clare's locker.

I stopped as I veered into the hallway where Clare's locker was. There she was, leaning against Clare's locker smiling at me. I could only see her silhouette in the dark hallway.

"Eli, baby, I knew you'd come to find me soon enough," Elizabeth cooed, "We're drawn together by fate, you see?" She straightened up and took a step towards me.

"You're sick, Elizabeth," I said shortly.

"Lovesick maybe," she chuckled and took another step forward. I was beginning to see the whites of her eyes glowing at me through the shadows.

I took a step forward to show her that she didn't intimidate me. My face was stoic as I challenged her. I wasn't going to let myself be afraid.

Suddenly she was right in front of me, pushing me up against a locker. I felt my head bang against the metal door and I winced at the pain. Elizabeth's lips were on mine and I felt her hands grazing my body. She abruptly pulled back and snatched my hand in hers. With her free hand she pulled up her shirt, revealing her mutilated stomach. I felt vomit rising in the back of my throat as I saw my name carved into human flesh. The scars were dark and ugly, so prominent and shiny. She used my finger to trace the "E" and I recoiled from her.

I backed away from her, fear now fresh in my body. I wasn't numb anymore, I was revolted.

"I will never love you," I said, forcing calm to be in my voice, "Ever. You're disgusting and I will never"-here I took a step towards her-"be with the girl who killed Julia." I wanted my words to scare Elizabeth, to let her know that I knew it was she who had caused Julia's death.

The smirk was wiped clean off Elizabeth's face. Her face twisted into rage, and she looked demented, psychotic almost. I seemed to finally have reached her, she saw the truth behind my words, which was evident in my eyes.

I turned away from her and started to walk away. I could hear her breathing heavily behind me, still rooted by Clare's locker.

"I'LL MAKE YOU FUCKING PAY, ELI" she screamed, her voice echoing around us as I continued to walk away from her, although I quickened my pace.

"I WILL MAKE YOU HURT. WE BELONG TOGETHER, AND NOTHING...AND NO ONE WILL GET IN MY FUCKING WAY!"

Now, I was running and I was out of the school and in Morty and gunning the engine out of the parking lot. I had wanted to scare Elizabeth into leaving Degrassi, but it was me who was once again, running scared.


	7. Since You're Gone

The next morning I decided to not tell Clare about the other night. She would only feel betrayed by me for breaking my promise and I know it would agonize her even more. We got to school and Clare started to head for her locker when I asked her if we could stop at mine first. Clare looked confused but agreed, even though her locker was closer than mine. I couldn't help it though, I was afraid Elizabeth would be waiting by Clare's locker like last night, bearing her disfigured stomach.

We got to my locker and I pretended to rummage around in it while I kept my eyes peeled for a sign of Elizabeth. When I didn't see her, I stuffed my history book into my bag and Clare and I set off for her locker. With ever step, my dread seemed to rise. We got to Clare's locker and as I, yet again, scanned the crowds for Elizabeth I missed Clare's discovery.

"Oh, look at this!" Clare exclaimed. I jumped and spun around, thinking that Elizabeth had maybe left a dead rat or something sinister in Clare's locker as a warning. Instead I spotted a small picture of Alli and Clare taped to the outside of Clare's locker.

"Alli must have left this here, since we haven't been hanging out much. I guess she misses me," Clare said as she peeled the picture off her locker and stuck it in her backpack. "I'll talk to her during math class."

I nodded my head as the bell rang. I walked Clare to math and then doubled back around for my anatomy class. Something didn't feel right to me, I just couldn't put my finger on it.

The day passed sluggishly and finally it was time to head home. I met Clare at her locker and we started to stroll towards Morty. Clare looked fidgety and distant. She kept wringing her hands together and biting her nails. We got into Morty and headed towards Clare's house.

"You alright?" I asked. Clare took a couple of seconds to answer, almost like her thoughts were in a completely other place.

"Yeah, I'm fine," she murmured. She stared out of her window.

"Did something happen? With Elizabeth?" I prodded. Clare was never this secretive and distant and it bothered me.

"No, I'm um...I'm not sure yet. I have to call maybe? It'll all be fine though, I'm sure," Clare said, although she appeared to be talking more to herself than me.

My brow furrowed in confusion.

"Huh. Pause, rewind, and play," I said as I pulled into Clare's drive. Clare finally snapped out of her funk.

"What? Sorry Eli. I'm just thinking about something else. I'll call you tonight! Bye!" Clare gave me a kiss on the cheek and leaped out of the car. I noticed she was biting her lip and I wondered what it was she was thinking about.

I found out later that night.

It was 2 a.m. and I was fast asleep until I heard Dead Hand blare from my phone. Disoriented, I grabbed it off my nightstand and after fumbling with it for a second, managed to answer it.

"Huh, hello?" I yawned into the phone. Clare's hysterical voice crackling on the other end of the phone snapped me instantly awake. I sat bolt upright.

"Clare? What's wrong? What's going on?" I shouted.

"Eli, s-she's missing-Alli's missing! She wasn't in school today and I was w-w-worried about her and Sav j-just called me and said she hasn't been seen s-s-since this morning," Clare cried.

I felt cold. This call felt so familiar. The hysteria on the other end. It reminded me of the night Julia died. My heart sank. Elizabeth had been responsible for Julia's death, and now was she responsible for Alli's disappearance? I remembered Julia's words from last night, "I WILL MAKE YOU HURT. WE BELONG TOGETHER, AND NOTHING...AND NO ONE WILL GET IN MY FUCKING WAY!"

It looked like Elizabeth had decided to hurt me after all. By hurting Clare, and taking away her best friend. I remembered the picture on Clare's locker. It hadn't been Alli who'd taped it there, and I was right, it was a sinister warning.

"Clare," I whispered into the phone, "There's something I have to tell you about last night..."


	8. We're All To Blame

After getting off the phone with Clare, I hurried and jerked on some clothes and left to go to her house. I wanted to tell Clare in person about my mistake the other night, that foolish, idiotic mistake. Guilt consumed me; if anything happened to Alli I knew I was to blame. I raced Morty to Clare's house and screeched into her driveway. I jumped out of the car and when I got up to Clare's door, it flew open and Clare launched herself into my arms, crying.

I quietly closed her front door and Clare and I sat on her front steps. I had my arm around her and I could feel her body racking with sobs. Was it possible to feel even guiltier than before? I felt my throat close up but I cleared it and gently scooted away from Clare so I could face her.

"I went to Elizabeth last night," I confessed. Clare looked at me dumbfounded but before she could say anything, I quickly continued. "I was angry Clare. She was making you sick with worry and I couldn't stand it so I went to the school because I knew she'd be there. And she was...and I yelled at her and I told her I'd never be with her and I told her that I...that I knew she killed Julia. She just lost it and she threatened to hurt me...and she said no one would get in her way. I'm so sorry Clare, this is all my fucking fault-"

I felt the guilt and anger rise within me and I stood up. I couldn't stand this; I couldn't stand being in my own fucking body. I swung my foot out and kicked Morty as hard as I could. A large dent appeared in his side but the anger was still there. I swung back my leg again but Clare yanked on my arm pulling me away.

"Stop it, Eli," she said hotly, "I don't...I don't blame you. Elizabeth would have pulled something like this even if you didn't go and see her. We just need to tell someone okay? We need to go to the police."

I shook my head firmly though. "No, they aren't going to help. They're going to want to know how I knew about Elizabeth killing Julia and I don't have any proof and they're just, they're just going to start pointing fingers at us. They'll think we're the guilty ones or some shit like that."

"Eli-" Clare began to protest but I shook my head again.

"Clare, you know it's true, you know they'll do that."

She gave me a resigned look but she nodded her head and sank back onto the front step of her house. I sat next to her and buried my head in my hands. My head was throbbing with pain and my stomach felt sour.

"I just hope wherever she is, that's safe," Clare whispered, talking about Alli. I nodded my head. God I hope so too, I thought.

* * *

Clare and I sat on her porch all night. We didn't talk much, just sat there, comforting each other in silence. When the sun broke out of the horizon we got up and left for school. Another day trying to learn on no sleep.

When we got there, there were police cars everywhere. People were huddled in groups, some were crying, others were talking fervently to their friends. Clare and I looked at each other. We both knew this involved Alli.

We got out of the car and Clare quickly rushed over to Sav. Sav had his head in his hands, and Holly J was trying to comfort him by rubbing his shoulder.

"Sav?" Clare asked quietly.

Sav looked up. His eyes were red-rimmed and it was clear that, like us, he had gotten no sleep either.

"Where's Alli?" Clare asked, her voice cracking as she tried to keep her tears at bay. There was no point in upsetting Sav further.

Sav just shook his head and looked away. Holly J answered for Clare.

"She's still missing," Holly J replied, her voice full of misery, "And the police think that, that Alli's hurt." A tear rolled down Holly J's face. Sav let out a choking sound, and his shoulders began to shake as he bawled. Clare paled.

"Why would they think that?" she demanded, her voice coming out in a squeak.

Sav looked up. His light brown face was streaked with tears and he tried to control his sobs as he answered Clare.

"Because the police found blood a couple streets down from us. There was a lot of it and..and...and Alli's...Alli's charm bracelet was right next to it."

* * *

It was two days later that the police found Alli's body. Her throat had been slit. The police also said one of Alli's wrists had been broken, as if Alli had tried to fight back against her attacker. There was a note left too, a note that read: "THANKS FOR THE INFORMATION, AL. YOU HELPED ME A BUNCH. XOXO."


	9. Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien

It was my second funeral for someone I knew. It was also the second time I was going to a funeral where a young girl's life had been taken from her too early. I sat with Clare in the pew, gripping her hand. Clare was sobbing quietly and I too had tears running down my face. I was responsible for the death of two girls. It should be me lying in a coffin, not Alli or Julia.

Sav and his mother and father were sitting two benches in front of us. Sav's grief was overwhelming and I had to turn my head away at his petite, whimpering mother. The responsibility of what I had caused weighed down so heavily on me it was a miracle I didn't collapse onto the floor. When the ceremony ended and Clare and I got up to leave, we smacked right into Elizabeth. She had tears on her cheeks and she was dressed the part in all black. When she saw us she let out a soft wail and said, "Can you believe this happened? Oh my god."

Clare looked at Elizabeth. The look in Clare's eyes was pure, raw hatred. Clare stepped up to Elizabeth and I was completely and utterly shocked when Clare hugged Elizabeth. That was until Clare put her mouth right next to Elizabeth's ear and whispered, "It's only respect for Alli's family that I don't kill you right here and now you fucking bitch." I noticed that as Clare said this, that Elizabeth's nails dug into Clare's back. Clare let go of Elizabeth and calmly stepped back to my side.

"Let's go," Clare said airily. We left and as I looked back I saw Elizabeth staring at Clare with an amused look on her face. She smiled and then walked into the crowd of mourners.

Clare and I arrived back at her house. Clare sat in my car for a second and then asked if I wanted to come in. I looked at her. There was something in her voice, a lilt to her words that was strange.

"Are your parents home? Would they mind me coming in?" I asked.

"They had to work today. They won't be home for awhile," Clare replied and then she leaned over, took the keys out of Morty and got out of the car. I had no choice but to follow her into the house and up to her room, wondering what on earth Clare was doing.

As I shut the door of Clare's bedroom, Clare threw herself at me. Her lips were hot and hungry on mine. Her kisses made my entire body melt but I gently pried her off me.

"Clare, what are you doing?" I muttered wonderingly.

"I need you. I just need to be with you," Clare said, her voice dripping with desperation.

I led Clare to the bed and we sank onto her comforter with our lips once again, fused together. Clare started to yank my blazer off, her lips still pressed to mine. I shrugged out of it and rolled Clare so that my body was pressed on top of hers. She hurriedly peeled my shirt off and suddenly there I was, my bare chest against Clare. I was too acutely aware of Clare slowly working on the zipper of my pants when I pulled away. Clare looked up at me, bewildered.

"What's wrong?" she said, her bottom lip trembling. "Do you not want to be with me?"

"Clare," I tried to find the words that wouldn't hurt her, "I have wanted to be with you since day one. I've thought about it every day since I met you but you're hurting right now and I don't think you're thinking clearly right now. I don't want you to wake up tomorrow morning realizing you made a huge mistake. I can't do that to you."

Clare suddenly pushed off the bed, her face boiling with anger. She threw my shirt at me forcefully.

"What the fuck, Eli?" she yelled, "I'm throwing myself at you and...and you won't even just do me a favor and do this for me? You killed my best friend...you owe me!" At this Clare fell to the floor, crying. I went to her side and sat next to her.

"Clare," I said, taking her chin and lifting up her beautiful face so that her eyes met mine, "I know you so well. I know you'll regret this. I want to be there for you but not like that, at least right now. Just please know, that I want that with you all right? I want to be with you like that just not under these conditions. I love you."

Clare nodded her head and pulled me to her. We held on to each other and slowly I lifted her up in my arms and laid her on the bed. I slid right next to her and we sat like that, are arms and legs intertwined until the sun slid out of the sky.

Around eight at night we slowly got out of the bed so that I could leave. I would have stayed there all night, with my arms around Clare but we both knew her parents would never allow that. Clare walked me to the front door and we stood there for a second.

"Thank you," Clare said, looking me shyly in the eyes, "For being there for me. For...for telling me no. I appreciate that, I really do."

I kissed her softly on the forehead and opened the front door. I was about to step out when Clare stopped me. Her eyes were focused on the ground where a piece of paper lay on her doormat.

I bent down and picked it up. It fluttered lightly in my hand. As I read the message I started to grip the paper harder in my hand. When I finished it I balled the paper into a ball in my fist.

Clare had read the note too and she looked at me, her face serene.

"I guess Elizabeth didn't like my comment today," she said, her voice wry.

I looked down at the ball of paper in my clenched hand that read: CLARE, ALLI WILL SEE YOU SOON. XOXO. I threw the paper away and hugged Clare to my chest. No one would hurt her, not a living fucking soul.


	10. Night of the Hunter

**(Clare's POV)**

After finding the note, Eli wouldn't leave me until my parents came home. When they finally arrived home an hour later, squabbling as usual, Eli gave my hands a quick squeeze and departed with a small, worried smile.

I was about to go up to my room when my mom intercepted me. She held me at arm's length and looked me in the eyes. "Honey, are you okay? With Alli? I know this must be so hard for you and I'm really worried about you."

At the mention of Alli, I felt a pang in my chest. I looked at my mom and I wanted to shake her. I just wanted to scream, "OH I'M FINE MOM. I'M JUST PUTTING UP WITH A GIRL WHOSE KILLING PEOPLE TO GO AFTER MY BOYFRIEND AND SHE WANTS TO KILL ME TOO." My mother was a selfish woman now. She hadn't noticed that I was always depressed, that I was losing weight because I couldn't eat, that I was forever with bags under my eyes because I didn't sleep. My mother was in her own little world, just figuring out how she and my dad could piss each other off next.

I shook her hands off me and muttered, "I'm fine" and then headed up the stairs. I closed the door to my room and locked it. I fell onto my bed and sat there for a while thinking.

It was clear from Elizabeth's note that she wanted me dead. For some reason though I was strangely not afraid of her. I felt like she was growing weak, that killing was how she showed that she was growing desperate. I closed my eyes and tried to put myself in Elizabeth's head. She clearly saw me as a threat, although she'd probably thought me that way since she saw me with Eli. It was thinking of Eli that made my blood boil. Elizabeth was fucking with his head, putting so much guilt and worry on him that I knew soon he wouldn't be able to handle it. He was so close to breaking down that I was worried sick over him.

I let my thoughts drift to Alli. I squeezed my eyes shut even harder trying to keep the tears in. I could only imagine Alli begging for her life. She'd trusted Elizabeth as a friend, even though Alli had just been a pawn to Elizabeth. While the police were baffled about the note left by Alli's body, I understood what it meant. It meant that Alli had dished about Eli and I. She had spilled our secrets over to Elizabeth and now Elizabeth had information on us that she could whip out and use at any time.

I rolled over and looked at my alarm clock. The turquoise numbers glowed 3:14 a.m. I wanted to do something. I couldn't sleep (what else was new?) and I felt myself growing restless. I decided I wanted to be with Eli. I threw on some jeans and then I quietly crept out of my house.

I was softly closing my front door when I heard a voice behind me. I whirled around, slamming the door in the process. Elizabeth was standing on the sidewalk outside my house.

She looked up at my home and her eyes stared directly at my bedroom window. She scanned it over and then gave me a smile. "Nice house you got here. It looks cozy."

"How long have you been here?" I asked. I wanted to run at her and knock the smile off her face but I knew she wanted that. Elizabeth wanted me to be irrational. She wanted to see me lose it and I wouldn't do that, not yet anyways.

My calm surprised her. She lifted an eyebrow at me and grinned. I noticed that when she smiled like that her face took on an elderly appearance. Her forehead seemed too high and wrinkled and her eyes got big and wide. She looked manic, and it dawned on me that Elizabeth was a true sociopath.

"Not gonna hit me Clare? I sliced and diced up your best friend," she called.

"I know you did," I said. I plastered a smile on my face even though it killed me.

Elizabeth gave me another smile. "You're kind of crazy Clare...I like that. It makes this all the more fun. Now, I know you didn't come outside at this late hour just to see little ole' me. Where you running off to?"

I smiled sweetly at her. I had a hand behind my back that I curled into a fist, my nails digging into my flesh as I fought to control my rage.

"Oh you know," I said airily, "I was just off to go sleep with Eli."

A soft breeze rippled around us, tossing up a couple of leaves into the air, other than that though the world had become silent, electric. Elizabeth was staring at me, her face now vicious.

"You're lying," she whispered. She took a step towards me. We were close now. Only a couple of feet away. She stared intently into my face and then gave a soft titter.

"Oh sweetie, you're as virginal as they come. You've got innocence all over your fucking face. There's no way you've slept with Eli." Elizabeth just shook her head and laughed again but she quickly sobered up.

"Me, on the other hand? Well, let's just say I've slept around quite a bit. No one has ever come close though to being as good as Eli is in the sack." Elizabeth stared directly in my eyes as she said that last part.

I felt a chill go up my spine but I didn't back down. It was clear Elizabeth was lying through her teeth.

"Like Eli would sleep with filth like you," I said with amusement.

Elizabeth suddenly tossed me something. I didn't catch it and watched as it hit my foot. It was a DVD case, with a clear cover showing me the DVD inside. I looked up questioningly at Elizabeth.

She was walking away though and as she started to make her way down the sidewalk she called up at me with great mirth. "Ah sweet Clare, you don't know Eli like I do."


	11. We've Got A Big Mess On Our Hands

The morning after Alli's funeral I went to go and pick Clare up. After Elizabeth's threat yesterday my worry for Clare had gotten notched up even higher. I pulled into Clare's driveway and gave a quick beep with the horn to announce my arrival. I waited for Clare to emerge from her house but she didn't. Minutes ticked by and I started to feel sick. I slowly got out of my car, my legs feeling weak, and knocked on Clare's front door.

The door swung open revealing...Clare's mom. She had a glass of orange juice in her hand and looked quite harried.

"Oh Evan right?" she said quickly, as she gave me the once over. I noticed her staring at Morty behind me. I could see the judgmental look plain as day upon her face.

"Uh Eli, actually," I said quickly, "Is Clare home?"

Clare's mom sighed and said, "She already left for school on her bike. I guess she forgot to call you. Now I really have got to get going..."

I nodded and the door shut in my face. I headed back to Morty, shaking. Was Clare stupid? She knew the risks of leaving her house alone; Alli was living, well not-so-living proof of the danger there was.

I felt myself growing pissed off. If she had wanted to bike to school she could have at least told me. What fucked up game was she playing at? She knew I would be worried sick about her. My anger steadily rose as I continued to drive to school.

When I got out of Morty I looked around at all the people milling about before school started. I searched for Clare and found her, hugging a distraught Jenna.

I walked up to them and said, "Clare, I need to talk to you."

She ignored me and said to Jenna, "Everything is going to be fine okay? I'll come over later and we can...we can talk about Alli." Jenna gave a great sniffle, hugged Clare hard, and walked away. I opened my mouth to say something to Clare, when she brusquely turned and started to leave.

I reached forward and grabbed her by the arm, turning her around to look at me.

"What the hell, Clare?" I said quietly, my tone annoyed. "Where were you this morning?"

Clare jerked her arm away from and got up in my face. Her eyes were wild with fury.

"You...are...disgusting," Clare hissed. Her voice was poisoned; I could feel her words burning me.

"What?" I cried. "What did I do? Are you still mad about...you know last night?" I was grasping at straws, trying to understand what I'd done to make Clare look at me like I was the lowest human being on the planet.

Clare shook her head furiously, her hair swinging around face. Her cheeks blazed red.

"You slept with her!" Clare yelled. A couple of kids turned and looked at her, smelling a new school scandal. "You acted like you were this goddamn helpless victim and you lied! How could you even look me in the eyes knowing that because of you Alli is gone? She's dead, Eli, and it's all because of your one night stand!" Clare was crying now. I felt my body grow cold. There was no way Clare could know about that. She couldn't unless...

"Elizabeth told you," I murmured.

Clare looked up at me, her face filled with anguish.

"No Eli...she showed me." Heartbreak filled Clare's words and she turned and walked away.

I didn't try to stop her. I walked back to Morty and left. I drove, my destination clear in my mind. It took me an hour to get there but I felt like no time had passed. When was the last time I had come here? Surely, it hadn't been a year ago, but I knew it had been just that long. I parked Morty and made my way up the sloping hill. The grass was fresh and pure green and it rustled against my feet as I walked. Brightly colored flowers popped up here and there, amongst the dying, brown flowers as well. I found what I was looking for and kneeled down.

"Hey Jules," I whispered, my finger tracing along her tombstone. I stretched out and lay next to Julia's grave. I closed my eyes and let my mind revisit the biggest mistake of my life. It was a moment I wasn't proud of, and it was also the moment that caused so many lives to get fucked up. Had I known that back then, I wouldn't have done it. I wouldn't have been the asshole I had been back then. But I had, and what was done was done.

* * *

_"Hey," I said. I smirked at her._

_"Hey baby," she crooned, running her finger along my jaw, down across my throat._

_I pulled her forward and mashed my lips against hers. I knew this was wrong, but God, it felt so good. Our tongues met, intertwined and I slowly moved her backwards towards the bed._

_My shirt gone. Her shirt gone. Bra off. Pants thrown to the side. Then we were one._

_Elizabeth moaned underneath me. When we finished, she stroked the damp hair that stuck to my forehead._

_"I love you, Eli," Elizabeth whispered._

_"Liz," I sighed, "you know I'm with Julia. This was just..."_

_"Teenage hormones?" she asked, and we laughed._

_"You know I love Julia," I said again. I felt Elizabeth slide away from me a little bit but I kissed her cheek and she stopped moving away. "She's someone I care about a lot but I wanted to be with you. I feel like a jerk, but I can't help how I feel about you both."_

_Elizabeth turned her head and looked at me, her hair messy and bedraggled. She took my hand in hers and kissed my fingertips._

_"Eli, one day you're going to realize it's me you're supposed to be with. Tonight was just the first night of us, there will be more."_

_I just kissed her again, mostly to shut her up because I did love Julia. It wasn't that I didn't I wanted sex and Julia wasn't offering. Elizabeth was and I just wanted to take her up on her offer.

* * *

_

I was crying. My sobs were loud, and I didn't try to conceal them.

"Jesus, Julia I'm so sorry. I don't know why I did it. I was such an idiot. Such a fucking moron. Now you're gone and Alli's gone. I'm not going to lose Clare though, I can't." I gripped Julia's tombstone and then stood up. I used my sleeve to wipe away my tears and looked down at where my ex-girlfriend's body laid beneath mounds of dirt and a coffin. Because of me. "I'm going to fix my mistake, Jules. I promise you I will." I left and headed back to school.


	12. Your Guardian Angel

_Dear Clare,_

_I know you're pissed. I know I'm not the guy you thought I was. I want to talk to you, even if it makes you scream at me. I want to look at you, even if you're looking at me as the most horrible person in the world. You don't understand that out of everything in my life you have been the one right choice I've made. I lied to you, I've pushed you away and wouldn't let you get close and I'm sorry. I'm writing this to explain myself. Because you deserve to see who I am, in and out, I will bear my soul for you. I don't ask for your forgiveness because you've given it too much already. I just ask that you hear me out._

_Would it amaze you that I wasn't always a guy who cared about other people's feelings before I acted? Would it shock you that I'm not always a nice guy? You see Clare, you've always seen me a better person than I've ever been. You chose to see the best in me and when I realized that about you, I used it to my advantage. I wanted you to see me in a good light and it was that reason I never told you about who I used to be._

_I used to be an asshole. An absolute douche. I cheated on Julia, and other girls. I did drugs and drank until I didn't know what it even was to be sober. I didn't do it to escape from anything; I did it because I could. I didn't give a fuck who I hurt. If I hurt anyone, it was because they got in my way and it was their own damn fault. That's the person I used to be Clare. I'm not proud of being that Eli._

_What happened with Elizabeth, it was just a normal thing for me. I didn't think twice about it. I wanted to screw someone, and I screwed Elizabeth while I screwed Julia over for the millionth time. Julia was a great girl who I took advantage of. She deserved someone so much better. Anyways, back to Elizabeth. After that night, she got possessive. She told me that we were meant to be together. I wanted a fuck and she wanted a relationship. I told her that I didn't want that, that I was with Julia but she didn't believe me. What I told you about Elizabeth was true. I just left out why she became obsessed with me._

_You know what's weird? About a month before Julia died I started treating her right. No more sex behind her back, no more pill-popping, alcohol-guzzling charades. I asked her for a second chance, and she gave me one. I did love her. I realized what an amazing person she was. I realized that I was lucky to find a person like that in my life. But it was too late for Julia; I'd already screwed that up without even knowing it. I live with her death every day Clare, and now I live with Alli's as well._

_Do you want to know why I didn't tell you about sleeping with Elizabeth? It wasn't just because I was ashamed. It was because when I met you I realized that fate had given me another chance. You were an amazing girl, the perfect girl, and I got to start over. I was given the opportunity to not make the same mistakes as before. I was scared to tell you about who I had once been because I knew you'd leave me. How could Perfection possibly want to stay with Screwed Up? That's what you are Clare: perfection._

_I don't know why I hid the truth from you when I found out how accepting you were. You always gave second chances, and third and fourth ones too, but still I didn't tell you what I'd done. I guess it's because I'd fallen in love with you, and the thought of telling you something that might break your heart...well, I couldn't do it. Do you understand? I couldn't possibly risk losing you. I know that sounds foolish, naive and, quite frankly, selfish but I didn't care. I wanted you to be with me because I knew I couldn't live without you._

_I've done stupid things Clare. I've made my mistakes. I've caused two deaths. I'm messed up, ya know? You knew that, and you loved me anyways. You gave me that, and no matter what will happen to me in life, at least I can say I once had an angel like you love me. You are the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I would die to protect you. Whether you want me to or not. I will always be yours._

_Love,_

_Eli_


	13. Carjack My Heart

(Clare's POV)

The note was clipped to my bike's front wheel. I pried it off and shoved it into my jacket pocket. I saw Elizabeth watching me from the steps of the school. She had clearly sent me the note, and I wasn't going to give her the satisfaction of reading it in front of her. I hopped on my bike and began to pedal my way home. Despite trying my hardest, I couldn't stop myself for looking for Eli's car in the parking lot. It wasn't there. I pedaled on.

_He's probably hooking up with some skank right now_, the voice in the back of my head whispered slyly. I couldn't agree more. Last night had been...horrible to say the least.

After Elizabeth had walked away I had went back into my house and just sat at the computer for an hour. I tried to get the will power to put in the DVD but I was terrified. I knew what Elizabeth was implying and I didn't want it to be true. Soon though, I realized I needed to face the facts and had slipped the DVD into the slot.

A screen had popped up with a video. I watched as Eli and Elizabeth began to kiss, as they toppled over onto the bed (much like Eli and I had done only mere hours before), as clothes were ripped off in a fit of passion and as they had sex. I had clicked out of the little window before I could see anymore. I never left the computer that night. I sat there...trying to understand. But I couldn't. Eli had done something so vile that I knew I would never look at him the same way. He was by far, the worst person I'd ever met.

I loved him still. That's why I was so angry. Not because Eli had lied, but because what he had done was horrible and I still couldn't fall out of love with him. Eli had a grip on me that I hadn't known was there. If I knew he would have had this hold on me I would have left him sooner, before he became the center of my universe.

I arrived home and went straight to my room. I couldn't even think about being anywhere near my computer, last night's images still imprinted to the back of my head; fresh.

I took the note out of my pocket; my fingers trembled slightly. I didn't want to be afraid, but I was. It wasn't the thought of Elizabeth threatening me that scared me, but what else she would tell me about Eli. I placed the note on my bedside table and tried to take a nap. Sleep would not take me though and I angrily grabbed the note. I might as well just get it over with. I needed my peace of mind.

I unfolded the piece of paper and I took in the words: "_Dear Clare, I know you're pissed. I know I'm not the guy you thought I was..._" My eyes slowly filled with tears. Eli had left me the note. I noticed as I read on that there were small spots where the letters had smudged, as if Eli had been crying as he wrote, with his tears dotting the paper.

My eyes trailed over the final sentence: "_I will always be yours._" My heart soared. For some reason, Eli and I were tied together, whether by destiny or some cosmic force. We would be a part of each other through every tragedy and fight, every scandal and laugh. I had met my counterpart. Elijah Goldsworthy.

I tugged my phone out of my pocket and dialed his number. I needed to hear his voice. I needed to tell him that I loved him, that I always would, and that I forgave him for his secrets. I wanted to tell him I wasn't perfect, that he shouldn't keep me on a pedestal, that we had to have honesty between us if we ever wanted this to work. I needed him.

The phone rang once and then stopped. I looked at my phone's screen to see if I had maybe gotten disconnected but it said I was on the line.

I slowly placed the phone back to my ear. At first I just heard silence, and then breathing.

"Eli?" I asked tentatively.

Soft breaths. A whispering sound. "Goodbye Clare." A girl said.

"Elizabeth?" I gasped. The phone disconnected.

I ran. I ran faster than I ever had in my life. I was not an athletic girl, but my adrenaline kept me going. I was racing down the streets, searching for a hearse, for a boy with skinny jeans and a guitar pick necklace, for a girl with mental instability. I was running by his house when I noticed Eli's hearse parked in the driveway. Where was Eli? My mind was racing faster than I had. Then I looked down the street; a small lump was in the middle of the road.

"No," I whispered. My breath was coming out in short little spurts. "No, no, no, no!" I was running towards the thing on the street. My heart stopped.

Eli was lying in the middle of the road. A trickle of blood ran down his temple. His face was ghostly white. He wasn't moving and blood pooled around his head. I heard a siren noise coming from far, far away. The siren must have been miles from here. I knelt next to Eli and held his hand, gasping. It was only a couple of minutes later when people started to run outside that I realized the siren was the sound of my screaming. Eli never stirred, he did not hear me.


	14. Kiss From A Rose

Squealing tires. Burning rubber. A jolt and then pain. Unbearable pain. Then nothingness. Absolute oblivion. Fluttering eyes, mine. Gripped hands, mine and...someone else's? Voices, so far away. Blaring light. Shouts. My hand holding nothing anymore. A whispered "I'll wait for you". A prick and back into oblivion.

My head pounded. A searing pain that blinded me. I couldn't move. Why couldn't I move? I felt like it took the strength of every atom in my body to even lift my eyelids. My vision was blurry but it gradually adjusted. I was in a room, quite generic but strange to me. I was lying in a bed and I could hear a beeping to my side. It took great energy but I managed to turn my head to the side to see that a machine was responsible for the beeping noise. The machine I noticed has tons of wires that connected to me. Clearly I was in the hospital but why? I realized slowly that someone was holding my hand. I turned my head once again, and stared at a girl with curly, light brown hair and the fairest skin I'd ever laid eyes on. Her hand held mine tightly, but the girl herself was fast asleep in a chair beside my hospital bed.

I reached out my hand and softly ran one of her soft curls through my hand. My vision was blurred again, this time by tears. The girl slowly stirred and then sat up blinking bright blue eyes at me.

"Hey Edwards," I whispered. Clare burst into tears and threw herself on me. Despite the pain, I pulled her onto the bed next to me and held her.

"Shhhh," I said, trying to soothe her. I rested my chin on the top of her head. "I'm fine, Clare."

She quieted down but I could feel the steady drop of tears on the back of my hand that told me Clare was still crying.

"I was so scared, Eli," Clare said, her voice barely audible. I buried my face in her soft hair, breathing in the lovely scent of her. She smelt subtly of roses.

"I'm sorry I scared you Clare. Christ, I'm sorry for all of this," I said. My voice wobbled and broke and Clare twisted her body so that our faces were together.

"Don't you apologize. It won't do anything. We're in this together, and I'm not going to leave you. Ever." Clare's voice was firm.

"Why do you even give me chances? I just let you down all the ti-" I started to say but then Clare's soft lips pressed against mine. Her kiss was soft and gentle, a kiss that matched the person she was.

"I am in love with you Eli Goldsworthy," Clare whispered her lips mere centimeters from mine. "Nothing you can do will change that."

I felt my throat close, I blinked my eyes to keep out the tears but then turned my eyes to look into Clare's. Her's were so beautiful, the color of the sky, of eternity. Eternity is what I wanted to spend with Clare.

Still looking into her eyes, I said quietly, "Clare Edwards, there will never be anyone like you in my life. Please don't ever leave me. I love you more than anything this world has to offer me."

I kissed her again, and both our tears mixed together, a cry of desperation, of relief, and most of all, of love in its purest form. I held her close to me, determined to never let her go.

* * *

The doctors told me I had gotten hit by a car. That I had banged my head on the pavement and blacked out. They told me I wouldn't suffer any long-term damage but I might be a bit scatter-brained for a while. They let me leave the hospital three days later.

Clare took care of me. She never left my side. The doctors always allowed her to sleep in a small cot by my bed every night. While Clare was in the bathroom once, a nurse had told me they usually didn't allow non-family members to spend the night but the doctors said they something in Clare and I had, and they had bent the rules for her.

The police had questioned me of course; Clare too. They wanted to know if I remembered seeing who was driving the car, if this was just a random accident or was someone in a feud with me? I told them I didn't know who wad driving, that I hadn't even seen it coming. Clare said that when she had gotten to my house that she hadn't seen anyone on the street. The police believed us and left. Clare though had told me the truth, how it had been Elizabeth. I already knew it but Clare just confirmed it for me.

I sometimes wondered why I didn't just come clean to the police. This would all be over if I told them but I doubted it. I had never been lucky when it came to cops, they saw me as a figure obsessed with death, and they mistrusted me the moment they laid eyes on my all black wardrobe. They might have trusted Clare, but part of me felt like they would think I had just manipulated her into saying what I wanted her to say. I didn't trust the police; I had no hope that they could help us.

The day I arrived home, Clare was right with me. My mom had visited me quite a bit in the hospital but she had my little sister to look after so she hadn't been there as often as Clare had. I didn't hold that against her, I loved my mom to death and I knew that being a single parent was hard on her. She picked Clare and I up at the hospital entrance and forbid me from doing anything but lie in a bed and watch TV.

"Clare, you make sure this boy doesn't get any crazy ideas in his head," my mom joked as she left us in my bedroom.

Clare cracked a smile and said, "You got it Ms. Goldsworthy." My mom slowly closed the door behind her and Clare sat next to me on the bed.

"I like your mom," Clare said. I felt her breath on my neck and I turned and kissed her on the forehead.

"Yeah, she's pretty good as far as moms go...and she likes you too," I said and Clare smiled. I knew that was important to her, that my family accept her. I knew Clare still felt like she had lost part of her family this year, what with her older sister off doing work in Kenya and with her parents at each others throats day and night.

"Want to watch a movie?" I asked her.

"Sure," Clare said and I turned on my TV and started flicking through channels with my remote. Clare was snuggled by my side. I found a cheesy horror flick and kept it.

Clare rolled her eyes and scoffed under her breath, "Typical Eli." I grinned at her.

This was almost...normal. Just Clare and I watching a movie, no worries. I missed this, being the carefree beings we had once been. I pulled Clare a little tighter to me and she gently squeezed my fingers. I knew she was thinking the same thought as me.

Just then my mom came bustling through my door again. Clare scooted a little bit away from me but my mom either didn't notice or pretended not to notice how close Clare and I had been. She was carrying a huge bouquet of roses in her hand.

"Look Eli, one of your friends must have had these delivered as a get well gift!" My mom had them in a vase and left them on my dresser.

"I'll just leave you two alone then," my mom said and then she quietly closed the door.

Clare and I looked at each other once my mom left. Clare and I really only had one friend and that was Adam. No way would Adam buy me a bouquet of roses.

"Clare?" I asked her but she nodded and got off the bed and walked towards the roses. A small note was tied around one of the stems and she pulled it off.

"_Roses are red, violets are blue, get rid of Clare, before I have to_," Clare read. She paused and then looked down at her finger, a small droplet of blood gleamed, right where a thorn had pricked her.


	15. The Way You Wear Your Head

**(Elizabeth's POV)**

I sat outside Eli's house. It was growing darker and darker as dusk began to settle around. I'd been hiding across the street since the roses had arrived. I was waiting, waiting for hours in fact. I didn't understand what she was still doing there. It was going on ten at night and Clare had been there since nine in the morning.

I sat in the cold. The wind's chill cast goosebumps across my skin. My hair shivered against my cheek. I was so lonely out here; I was always so miserably lonely.

_Elizabeth, you won't be lonely for long; Eli will be yours soon_, the voice in the back of my head whispered. I squeezed my eyes shut.

"Please no," I whispered, my teeth chattering. I wanted the voices in my head to stop, to just die and wither away. I was never alone in my head. So many voices, always yelling and talking. They only ever hushed up when Eli was around. That's why I was in love with Eli, because he was the only one who could make the voices stop, because he was the cure I'd been looking for.

Suddenly, with a soft buzzing sound, Eli's front porch light zapped on. I sat up, attentive, completely aware. I watched as Eli's door opened slowly and Clare and Eli emerged. I saw the white gauze bandages wrapped around Eli's head; a couple of his beautiful black locks peeking out beneath. My lip wobbled, my heart toppled and fell at the sight of him. He was so tragically beautiful that it hurt me just to look at him. He was a god. The porch light cast part of his face in shadow, but I could clearly see his eyes, the gorgeous green emeralds that they were.

I gazed as Eli softly pulled the door closed behind him. He stood on the porch with Clare. He gently placed his hands on Clare's upper arms. He pulled her close and I watched as he looked down at her. I saw it then, the love for her that he had. It was so crystal sharp and clear, it cut me like glass. I backed away, as the voices in my head began to scream their protests. I couldn't stop staring though as Eli placed his index finger beneath Clare's chin. He raised her face so that they were nose to nose. Clare's eyes mirrored Eli's, hers so full of passion. His lips pressed against hers and they wrapped into each other. They were tender and loving and I felt sobs try to escape my chest as I looked at Eli holding Clare as close as he could to him without hurting her. She was his and he was hers and I was no one's. I was nothing.

Clare let go of Eli and squeezed his hand. She began to depart when Eli reached out and held on to her shoulder. She turned around and I watched Eli's lips move. I could just make out what he was saying: "I love you...". Then I was gone.

* * *

How I ended up in the Degrassi girl's bathroom I don't remember. As I had ran from Eli's words, all I could see was the two of them interlaced and all I could hear were the voices, shrieking and yelling. I was deaf and blind to the world.

Now, I was looking in the mirror. I couldn't see myself though. I saw Julia. She placed her hand on the glass and stared at me, straight into my soul.

"Liz, I trusted you," Julia cried, "Why, best friend, why?" Her hand started to smack against the glass as her voice grew louder. Blood began to seep through her shirt. She clutched her chest and screamed, "THIS IS YOUR FAULT."

Then Julia was gone and my mother was looking at me.

"Oh Elizabeth, what mess have you made now?" my mother sighed wearily. Then she clutched at her neck where her strands of pearls were tightening. They began to throttle her and she lurched towards me, gasping, "YOU ARE TO BLAME FOR EVERYTHING."

Then my mother was gone and there was Alli. Alli looked at me with her bulbous brown eyes.

"I trusted you, you bitch," she said and then before she could say anymore, blood slithered down her neck and she collapsed.

Then I saw something so revolting and foul it made me ill. Her skin was decayed and gray, her eyes were scarlet and feral. Her hair was matted and greasy and she gave me a grin, her teeth rotted to the core. I looked at myself and started to scream.

Blood was everywhere, on my hands, in the sink, on the wall. I stared at the mirror, which was now shattered to pieces. I couldn't see the monster anymore in the shards of glass.

I just saw green. Dazzling green eyes staring at me from every piece of mirror. Then I watched as they disappeared and turned into a pink, crooked mouth. A smirk that opened wide and whispered, "Clare".

My hands were shaking as I covered my mouth to keep away the scream. I curled onto the floor.

"Please Eli," I begged, "Please don't." Hot tears dripped from my eyes and sped down my face. I stood up and ran towards the door. Before I yanked it open I looked at the mirror one last time.

I saw a lonely little girl at the age of five. She had blood all down her face and I could hear her in my head saying: "Please make the voices stop."

I collapsed in the janitor's closet where I slept every night. I cried for the little girl I'd once been, before my mind had taken over, and turned me into a creature not fit to walk this planet.

I never fell asleep that night, the voices wouldn't let me.


	16. Dog Days Are Over

**(Eli's POV)**

His gray mustache bristled at me. His eyes were partially hidden by his doughy face. His gaze was unyielding and focused; he was trying to break me, to make me squirm in discomfort. Didn't he get that his "menacing stare" was absolutely nothing to what I'd been through tonight? I'd been through hell, and I'd somehow made it out alive. I survived, but barely.

"Come on kid." The man's voice was gruff. "You've got to say something eventually."

* * *

**(Clare's POV)**

The woman placed her hand over mine, and gave me a simpering smile. She was playing the whole kind-mother role. She wanted me to trust her, to confide in her as if I were a thirteen year old with a diary. Eli gave me the willpower to stay strong though. I knew the situation didn't look good for us. I removed my hand from beneath the woman's and looked away from her.

"Clare," the woman sighed, "You've got to talk about it. This isn't going away."

* * *

**(Eli's POV)**

"So why were you there? School had been over hours ago, why did you go back?" The man tapped the eraser end of a pencil against his pad of paper. The tapping sound was driving me up the wall.

"I told you," I said through gritted teeth, "I got a text from Clare saying she was in trouble at the school. I went to go help her."

"Uh-huh..." the man said. His tone was skeptical. I felt my hands curl into fists underneath the table. I needed to keep my cool; if I freaked out there would only be more suspicion on me...and more suspicion on Clare as well.

_I hope Clare's doing okay_, I thought wistfully.

* * *

**(Clare's POV)**

"So," the woman said, "my partner tells me you were the one to get Eli to come to the school."

I couldn't help it. I broke my concentrated watch of the gray, shabby wall to lock eyes with the woman. Her soft brown eyes looked kindly into mine. I swallowed and opened my mouth for the first time all night.

"I didn't tell Eli to come...she texted him with my phone. It was just a setup," I said. My throat was dry. I tried to clear it and the woman noticing this slid a small paper cup of water towards me. I sipped it gratefully.

"Thank you," I mumbled, I looked down into my lap where I was twisting my hands together.

"Come on Clare," the woman said softly, "You need to tell us about what happened tonight. Eli is."

I felt my eyes fill up with tears, I needed Eli by my side right now. I ached without him.

"If I talk," I said, turning my watery eyes to the woman's, "Can I see Eli?"

The woman offered me a small smile, "Sure honey."

* * *

**(Eli's POV)**

"So why would Elizabeth want to lure you and Clare to the school?" the man asked. I had started to refer to him as Officer Doughy.

I rubbed my forehead furiously with the palms of my hands. I was so tired of this. If I talked, maybe I could get out of here faster.

"I slept with her over a year ago, " I confessed. Officer Doughy sat up and scratched away on his pad of paper. He looked at me, signaling to me to continue.

I leaned back into my chair, and crossed my arms tightly in front of me. I had been afraid of this moment since the night of Julia's death.

"I was with my girlfriend Julia at the time, but I had sex with Elizabeth anyways," I began. "Elizabeth didn't take kindly to me not leaving Julia afterward. Had this idea we were supposed to be together, like it was destiny or something..."

* * *

**(Clare's POV)**

"Elizabeth told Eli she'd make him hurt for what he'd done to her. She said no one would stand in her way and by that she meant Alli," I said to Officer Ludiski. I paused, thoughts of Alli were still painful to me.

Officer Ludiski tried to keep me back on track. "So you're saying that Elizabeth killed both Julia AND Alli?" She raised an eyebrow at me and I couldn't tell whether she believed me or not.

"Yes," I nodded. "I think...I think Alli was a warning for me."

"How so?" Ludiski inquired.

"Well," I said, trying to find the right words. Words were all I had right now to keep me out of jail. "Elizabeth saw me as the main target. She's like a cat with a mouse though. She wanted to play with me before she did anything. So Alli was her way of showing me what she was capable of."

Ludiski nodded, her lips pursed in thought.

I raised my eyes to look directly at her.

"Please tell me," I said, "No bullshit. I want the truth. Does it look good for me and Eli right now?"

Ludiski let out a long breath. She leaned forward so we made direct eye contact.

"The truth, Clare? It doesn't look good, you guys kept this to yourself for too long. It makes you look guilty."

* * *

**(Eli's POV)**

"Why didn't you come to the police with this information when you had it?" Doughy demanded, banging his fists against the table in frustration. "This whole thing could have been prevented."

I jerked away from my chair and stood so that it was me that towered over him.

"Why would you believe me? You've been looking at me like I'm some guilty felon all damn night. Clare and I were scared and we weren't thinking straight. I'm telling you the truth!" I spat.

Officer Dough pushed back his chair and stood. It was much more intimidating when he did it. His great mirth loomed over me.

"Eli," he said and he put his hands on the table and leaned forward so we were eye to eye, "You should have came forward with the information. We could have helped you. You dug yourself into a hole with this one."

"I never would have dreamed it would get this bad," I whispered, "Never."

Officer Doughy nodded and said, "Most don't, son."

* * *

**(Clare's POV)**

"Are we done here Officer Ludiski?" I sighed. "I'm so tired and I've told you all I could tell you."

"Yeah hun, we're done," Officer Ludiski said, a happy weariness in her voice. She sounded as tired as me. I gazed at her, hardly believing her words.

"You believe me then? No charges?" I was scared to hear the answer.

"No charges, your story matches up wit Eli's to a tee. You're both free to go." Officer Ludiski stood up and strode over to the door and held it open for me.

I got up on shaky legs and walked past her. I looked down the hallway as another door opened and a boy walked out. His shirt was covered in dried blood and he looked like he was about to collapse on his feet. His head turned in my direction and when he saw me his entire body seemed to fill with life.

I ran towards him.

* * *

**(Eli's POV)**

I grabbed Clare in my arms and held her to me.

"God Clare, God," I whispered frantically in her ear, holding on to her as if she were my life support.

Clare kissed me, her hands gripping the side of my face.

"I love you," she said as she cried, kissing my lips, my forehead, my neck.

I kissed her back and rested my forehead against hers.

"Clare," I said, "It's finally over..."

Clare bit her lip and nodded. "It doesn't feel like it though."

I put my arm around her shoulder and I led her out of the police station and into bright daylight. The world still felt dark to us though. We were still reliving what had happened to us only mere hours ago.


	17. We Put The Fun In Funeral

_**Hey guys, so this is what happened before Eli and Clare were taken into custody. By the way I realized I made a major mistake in the last chapter when I wrote in one of Eli's POV's about "Elizabeth's death" I actually mean Julia's. I fixed it though! So Elizabeth isn't dead...yet ;]

* * *

**_

**(Clare's POV) **

_-12 hours before-_

It was Friday. I breathed a sigh of relief. I'd been going to school for a whole week without Eli by my side. It was a bit nerve-wracking not having him near me, but I put on a brave face for him. I knew he was frustrated; the doctors had told him that he needed to take a week off. Eli wouldn't hear of it but his mom and I had basically chained Eli to his bed to keep him from leaving. When he saw that I wouldn't allow him to break his doctor's orders he had begged me to at least call him when I was walking to and from school. I had happily agreed; I didn't like the thought of walking alone anymore than he did. Especially after what had happened Sunday night...

When I'd arrived at school on Monday, there were police cars everywhere. I remembered how it felt like my heart had stopped. No, I thought wildly in my head, Please God, not another death. I saw Jenna standing in the crowd and I had darted up to her.

"Jenna?" I gasped, "What happened?" I feared the worst.

"I don't know!" Jenna exclaimed, her blue eyes wide with exhilaration. "Apparently someone broke into the school last night and smashed up one of the mirrors in the girl's bathroom. There's a lot blood or something. The police suspect foul play though...you know with Alli and everything." Jenna's eyes filled up and she bit her lip. Alli's memory still hurt us.

My thoughts were mainly focused on Elizabeth though. I knew that Elizabeth slept in the school but what had happened in the bathroom? I looked around for her but there was no sign of the petite, devilish brunette.

The police left around lunch with no clue as to what had happened. I waited though, for a body, for a clue, for any sign of Elizabeth's dirty work. None came.

That whole week, Elizabeth was missing. The bathroom was cleaned up, the mirror replaced. Speculations on what had gone down Sunday night spread like wildfire throughout the school. Eli worried about it too.

"It's like in the beginning again," he said on Wednesday night when I told him I still hadn't seen Elizabeth, "How we never saw her but she was still around."

I shook my head though in disagreement. "It feels different. Last time we knew she was around but this time it feels like she's actually gone."

Eli's eyes met mine, they were dark. "She's not gone."

* * *

Friday, I was walking home from school. I was excited at the prospect of spending a whole two days with Eli, without school interrupting. And to be completely honest, I was ecstatic over not seeing Elizabeth for such a long time. Maybe she had finally given up; packed her bags, and left. My heart soared with hope and it was this reason that I didn't call Eli as I walked home. I didn't feel as if I were in any danger, for the first time in awhile. I felt safe.

I should have felt naive.

I was only a block away from my house when I felt the rag over my face. I instantly inhaled and gasped at the chemical smell. The cloth scratched against my skin as I tried to claw it away. Suddenly my vision blurred and I was falling.

I woke up. I was sitting in a dark classroom. I looked out the window and saw the glow from a sliver of the moon. Night had fallen.

I felt disoriented, and my head was killing me. A wet, stinging pain seared across my forehead and when I tried to raise my hand, I met resistance. I was tied to a desk.

"What?" I asked, bewildered.

"Oh, you're awake. Good," a voice replied from the classroom doorway. I turned my head sharply and there was Elizabeth. She walked into the room and perched on the teacher's desk.

"I've been waiting for you to come around," she said simply.

"What are you doing?" I said. My heart pummeled inside my chest frantically. All I could see in my mind was Alli's dead body...how that might be me soon.

"This needs to end Clare," Elizabeth said. "Tonight." I noticed her hands were covered in deep gashes; dried bloody lines starting from her palms to all the way up her arms.

"What are you going to do?" I couldn't keep the tremor of terror out of my voice. I was sick with fear. _Please God_, I begged, _keep me safe, please_.

"Have some fun," Elizabeth intoned and then took a phone out of her pocket. My phone. "And we both know it won't be any fun unless Eli's here."

The way she was speaking was what made me afraid. There was none of her crazy sick joking; her voice was dull, dead.

"_Eli, please help me, I'm at the school, hurry._" Elizabeth read in a monotone as she typed.

She looked me in the eyes, her expression so detached it was like looking into the eyes of a corpse.

"Sent," she said.


	18. Bloody Romance

**(Eli's POV)**

_-8 hours before-_

I was pacing around my room like a maniac. Bed rest my ass. Clare hadn't called me. I waited for hours for her afterschool call but it never came. It was dark now and I needed to confirm my fears. I dialed her house number.

"Hello?" Clare's mom answered, her voice distracted.

"Hi, this is Eli." I cleared my throat. "Is Clare there?"

"Isn't she with you?" Clare's mom asked. I hated how she wasn't even worried about her daughter's whereabouts.

"Oh sorry, I forgot she said she was hanging out with Adam." I lied quickly. "Sorry, bye." I hung up.

I gripped my phone in my hand, so hard that my knuckles turned snow white. I was shaking, Clare was missing.

Then I felt my phone vibrate, just once; a text message. My hands were shaking so badly that the words blurred as I tried to read.

"_Eli, please help me, I'm at the school, hurry_." I read. I realized I was hyperventilating. Oh Jesus, no. I ran out of my house, not even bothering to tell my mom where I was going. I needed to help Clare, her life depended on it.

* * *

The school was even more dark and foreboding then it had been the first time I'd been there at night. I didn't pause to look though, I sped into the school and skidded through hallway after hallway shouting for Clare.

_Please don't let me be too late_, I chanted in my head.

Then from the next hallway I heard a scraping noise. It sounded like something was being dragged across the linoleum floor. I rounded the corner and saw Clare, tied to a desk, with Elizabeth right behind her.

"Hi Eli," Elizabeth said flatly. "Nice of you to join us so quickly."

I wasn't looking at Elizabeth though, I was staring into Clare's petrified eyes. Her hair was messy and there was a bloody gash above her left eyebrow but she didn't look like she had been hurt badly.

"Let-let her go Elizabeth," I plead quietly. "Please, this is just between you and me." I took a timid step forward.

"No Eli," Elizabeth said matter-of-factly, "You're lying. They told me so, they told me I had to get rid of her."

As Elizabeth spoke she drew a large knife out of the pocket of her dress. Clare whimpered and tried desperately to edge away. Elizabeth's hand whipped out and grabbed Clare's hair tightly in her fist, pulling her head back.

"Stop it," she said harshly. Tears trickled down Clare's cheeks, her eyes fastened on the knife.

I took another step forward, my heart racing as fast as my thoughts. I needed a plan, I needed to keep Elizabeth talking. Something, anything.

"Elizabeth, who told you that you needed to get rid of Clare?" I inquired lightly.

Elizabeth looked up at me, her eyes filling with tears. She took a step towards me, away from Clare. She waved the knife around.

"Don't act like you don't know," she sobbed, "You know that you're the only one who can make them go away." Behind her back Clare was managing to discreetly untie her wrist bondages.

"Make who go away Elizabeth?" I pressed, hoping to give Clare more time.

"STOP IT! STOP!" Elizabeth screamed, the knife swooped close to my face and I took a step back. "YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT ELI. YOU CAN HELP ME. WHY WON'T YOU JUST HELP ME?"

Suddenly she lunged at me and grabbed a handful of my shirt wit her hands. The knife nicked me underneath the chin and I tried to pry her hands off of me.

"I just want them to stop Eli," Elizabeth cried hysterically into my chest. "They tell me such awful things. Julia, my mom, Alli. It's there fault, I didn't want to but I had to. They told me we were meant to be together. You make the voices stop."

Elizabeth looked up into my eyes with a sad smile on her face.

"Don't you see now Eli? Clare has to go if you're going to be with me. I'm not going to live much longer if I can't have you. The voices are mad. The monster is mad. The monster will kill me." Elizabeth's voice became an undistinguishable whisper.

My eyes darted to Clare. Clare had finally untied herself and was quietly trying to stand up. Her chair squeaked and Elizabeth swung around.

"Nooooooo!" Elizabeth howled and lunged towards Clare.

I shoved Elizabeth hard, and she tripped, falling to the ground. I grabbed Clare in my arms and we watched almost in slow motion as Elizabeth fell, the knife plunging into her stomach. Clare and I stared in horror as Elizabeth began to wetly cough up blood from the ground.


	19. Free Bird

**(Elizabeth's POV)**

_-7 hours before-_

The knife perched jauntily in my stomach. I felt like I was leaking. Blood gurgled in my throat and I felt it dribble down my chin. I knew I was dying. The monster had won. I was relieved. I would finally escape the voices.

Eli and Clare stood over me, their faces wore an expression of horror and fascination. It was Clare who tugged free of Eli's grasp after a second and kneeled next to me. She took my hand in hers and I was surprised to see tears sparkling in Clare's eyes.

"I'm sorry Elizabeth," Clare whispered, "We'll get you help."

I shook my head and frowned, even though it hurt to move.

"I don't want help," I said, "I just want to be free."

Eli kneeled next to Clare's side and stared at me intently. He was trying to figure me out. I knew he was struggling. He hated me for hurting him, for going after Clare, for killing Julia and Alli but I realized he finally understood that it hadn't been me doing it.

"I'm sorry Eli," I croaked, my breathing becoming labored. I fought Death, I needed to make my amends before I left this earth. For the first time in years the voices weren't controlling me, I could finally speak.

"No," Eli shook his head. He brushed the hair out of my eyes and bit his lip. "Don't-" He couldn't find words.

I needed to explain to him and Clare what I'd been through. The knife dug deeper as I took a deep breath. Clare squeezed my hand even tighter.

"When I was a little girl I started to," I paused and took another breath. "To hear voices. They always yelled at me and told me I was stupid, worthless. They never went away and I was always afraid of them. Every time I-I looked in a mirror I saw this monster where I was supposed to be. I knew I was the monster."

I coughed and more blood filled my mouth. I spat it out and tried to continue.

"Eli when I met you the voices...j-just stopped. It was like I was waking up for the f-f-first time in years. You m-made them go away." My voice was growing weaker, talking was growing harder.

"I just n-n-needed you. The voices w-wanted you too. They told me"-I coughed-"that I had to get rid of the p-people around you if I wanted to be with you. I hope you understand. I hate myself. I'm a m-monster and I'm glad I'm g-going to die."

I paused and took the greatest breath of all. This would be my last statement, my vision was blurring and I knew Death was waiting for me impatiently. He had already taken the voices with him.

I looked into Eli's eyes and whispered, "Eli don't b-blame yourself for what I did. I was sick." I turned and looked at Clare. "You m-make him happy, please h-help Eli, and help each other..."

Clare sobbed and nodded. I closed my eyes and let Death carry me away in his arms.

* * *

When I opened my eyes I was in a bright field. Grass came up to me knees and tickled my bare legs as it swayed in the breeze. The sun glowed on me, I felt so light and free. There were no voices, there was no monster.

"Elizabeth," I heard a voice call out. I turned and there stood my mother in a beautiful white cotton gown, smiling at me radiantly.

"Mama?" I said. I ran to her and she hugged me.

"You're all better here Beth," she said as she held me in her arms. "I love you. I missed you."

I took my mother's hand and we walked into the sun.

* * *

**(Eli's POV)**

Elizabeth didn't stir. Her face was ghost white beneath the blood.

"She's gone, Clare," I whispered. I could hardly dare believe it. She looked so...little in death. It was hard to believe that she had been the cause of so much horror.

I stood up and reached down for Clare and pulled her up with me. We looked down at Elizabeth for the last time.

We turned to leave the school and to call the police when bright beams of light shined in both of our faces.

"FREEZE!" yelled a gruff voice and I felt myself being shoved into the locker. Someone's hands were patting me down.

"She's clear," a woman called and I turned and saw a young policewoman frisking Clare. An obese police officer was behind me. He reached and grabbed my hands and yanked them behind my back, cuffing them together. The woman was doing the same to Clare.

"You are both under arrest for murder," the man said and began to lug me down the hall. Clare was tripping over her own feet as the woman took her along too.

I looked back at Elizabeth, where another officer was holding two fingers to her wrist, searching for a pulse that wasn't there.


	20. My Happy Ending

_Dear Elizabeth,_

_ Clare thought it would be a good idea to write to you. Clare's usually right so I thought I'd give this a shot. _

_ It's been two months since you passed away. Clare visits your grave a lot, I try to come too but you know, after everything, it's still hard. _

_ You told me not to blame myself and I try not to but sometimes I feel like I tricked you into loving me. When we slept together, I mean. I shouldn't have done that and I'm sorry for what it did. For all the shit it caused. _

_ I didn't know about the voices. I wish you told me about them. That you told someone about them. You could have gotten help and Julia and Alli wouldn't be fucking dead right now. Neither would you. I'm sorry if I sound angry but I am still. You took away so much from me. You left me Clare though and for that I am grateful. _

_ The doctors told Clare and me that you had a severe case of schizophrenia. I don't know much about that, but from what they told me it sounds like hell. I feel bad for what you went through. I feel bad that no one was there to help you. You were trapped in your own head. God, it sounds so awful. _

_ Clare doesn't hold any grudges against you. She misses Alli a lot but she doesn't blame you anymore. She's also always there for me when I need her. Clare's a saint, she's perfect and I love her. _

_ I know this letter is just me rambling. Clare said it doesn't have to make sense, I just have to get my feelings out. So I guess that's what this is. _

_ I hope wherever you are now, that you are free. If anyone deserves happiness it is you. Tell Julia I still miss her and tell Alli to look over Clare. _

_ And Elizabeth? I just wanted to say, I forgive you too. _

_-Eli_

"Do you think she'll like it?" I asked. Clare and I stood by Elizabeth's grave. My letter to her was tucked underneath a rock to keep it from blowing away.

Clare kissed me on the cheek and grasped my fingers.

"I think it'll mean a lot to her," Clare said. "Do you want to visit Julia while we're here?"

I bit my lip. I turned to Clare and stared into those stunning cobalt eyes. The eyes that had taken me over from the moment I saw them.

"Actually," I said hesitantly, "I'm kind of sick of dwelling in the past. I'd kind of just like to be in the present for a while...with you. If that's okay?"

Clare rested her head on my shoulder.

"That sounds perfect," she murmured. We walked away and I felt for the first time in a long time something I thought I'd never feel again: happiness.

"Hey Clare," I asked, smirking slightly. "I could uh, use some help studying for my French exam if you know what I mean."

Clare raised her eyebrow at me in amusement. "I think that could be arranged..._boyfriend_."

_**~The End~**_


End file.
